M and I are hungry and we are making your pizza in the fridge. But you're having sex and we're not so we dont feel bad.
I watched the entire movie Forgetting Sarah Marshall before I realized it was in Spanish.
i've decided that sluts are like cars. they may look good as hell on the outside, but you never know what kind of shit is hiding under the hood.
I saw the video from Saturday. So, how much did I drink for me to think I was a duck and strip my clothes?
You remember the guy that busted in waving a tazer at everyone yelling "get the fuck outta my crib"?
yeah you don't forget that shit easily
We ended up crawling out from our hiding spot and playing pool with him once he calmed down. His name is Marcus. I got his email.
I woke up at 3am, my head in a toilet, still at the kegger, wearing a random cowboy hat.
I let my daddy issue flag fly free last night.
I guess when I black out I feel that it's not inappropriate to grope my gf in front of her parents.... But hey at least I'm starting off 2013 single
I just encountered the same creepy guy I showed you, he jumped inside the dumpster screaming.
Can you technically cross something off your bucket list if you don't, per say, remember it....?
I'm starting to think that birthday sex is just an urban legend. Like the boogey man, and woman orgasms.
Well according to all the calls, texts, and Facebook messages, I threw up on you guys last night.
he has the ass of a greek god and he made me breakfast
Sorry, that was mean and I didn't mean it. I'm just mad at condoms
That was my first party and they were so suprised that this little freshman girl was a FUCKING BEER PONG QUEEN.
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