This is some kinda fucked up sordid doggy brothel peepshow bullshit.
were with a gay guy with a minnesota accent. think about how funny that sounds.
dude if Megan calls say you Sis was house sitting for me yesterday , she f'n found dana's panties
im trying to make cookies in the george foreman
i chipped my tooth tryin to cut thru her pantyhose. that stuff is bulletproof.
you fell asleep spooning with his golden retriever. im not sure if thats more degrading for you or the dog
Well I found you sipping ron diaz out of a child's dinosaur cup while sticking your fingers in the guy's fish tank and watching the "pirahnas" snap at your finger and laughing
It's annoying. I only date people who are 6 foot 3, drug dealers, or 2 years older than me.
There is a literally infinite number of spliffs going around this table.
Delicious
I feel like I'm at a sushi bar with a spliff belt.
Ended up in some house where this dude has a $1200 leopard cat
the next thing I knew, I was on the floor of a Tim Hortons bathroom in Canada.
We were drunk waiting for tacos and I gave him a handy in the back of the Uber while giving the driver relationship advice. I think I'm handling the whole grad school thing alright.
Your cousin just directly asked you for nudes
If the amount of time the owner spent looking at my tits is any indication, I’d say I can probably sleep my way to the top
I’m not saying you’re wrong, I’m just saying he’s denying what you’re saying.
Randomize
