We just had the worst moment of our late twenties.... We just realized we are too old for the real world
I don't care if you go out, because at the end of the night I know i'll be the one fucking you.
that was completely unnecessary, true, but unnecessary
or how I got to mom's but there is vomit on my shoes. I never thought i'd be recapping with her.
I think this baby is eyeing my beer
all I heard when I woke up this morning was "BONG HITS FOR BREAKFAST" being yelled repeatedly.
Thanks for making breakfast. I usually have cereal and coffee...but i think margaritas and turkey sandwiches could catch on.
honestly I asked the same thing when we had our slip n slide and margarita party
That's terrible. At least give it a creative name like muff mobile.
Now he's trying to use the tornado warnings as an excuse to get head. Yeah, b/c THAT'S the last taste I want in my mouth b4 I die...
fat chick, vomit on the dog, and three unidentifiable pills in my ear. all in the same ear. what the hell happened after the guests showed up?
It's a journey
And the destination is his penis?
Precisely.
Dude, we apparently put a washing machine drum in that back of your truck with the full intention of making a bonfire in it.
all i want in life is a shot and a cock is that too much to ask
He was like 120 lbs and 20 of that was penis
how the FUCK did i spend 25 dollars at 50 cent beer night?
Randomize
