Alright folks.. i have made history - I just hit my 2nd PARKED car SOBER withing 6 months.. :*( wtf?!
Was going to watch Bolt. Fucked a stranger instead. Details later.
So you didn't like Bolt?
I didnt attack him, I heard I threw a chair at him- big difference. And you know Im not a creep so whatever
Four minutes until I can fart!
I like how my family gatherings are basically an ugly sweater party just with better beer and wine...
No, we have matured. We've stopped having sex in front if his room mate.
In the memo line of the check she wrote sexual healing.
I maybe late, he's in a peeing contest with the neighbor's dog. Currently he's in the lead.
I bought everclear. Bring your party pants and some addies
You're not gonna punch me in the face again are you?
I hate when you actually try to sing and people think you're joking so you just go with it, but on the inside you're crying.
Dick sucking on arrival? or would you like to cash that in later?
By the way, just opened the browser on my phone for the first time today... And it was it the "images" section of "who invented ass fucking"
So thanks for that
How does it make you feel that I can't control my vagina around you?
Just because I'm asexual doesn't mean I can't have a revenge fuck.
She’s a Vegas 8, which makes her an Oklahoma 27
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