Getting fucked up met up rando with a girl I confesswed my love for last night. weird, going with it
Hey when I die alone will you come by often enough so that my cats don’t eat my face?
everytime she opens her mouth i wish that i was deaf
I just read the lonely terrorist on nwa had 40 more friends than me on facebook
I think it was the chocolate body paint and awesome blowjob that finally made us official.
The fact that I am sitting home writing a resume while you're out inducing vomiting makes me feel like way more of an adult than I'm ready to be.
Crumbling up chips, putting them in salsa, eating with spoon. New level of stoner fatassery. Its so genius/delicous i'm not even ashamed
I think my mom knows im high. It could be because im slow dancing with my cat in the kitchen. The dip and kiss is what gave it away.
I don't think it counts as a walk of shame when it's someone you've wanted for 4 years. That's mission accomplished.
Pretty sure I just puked up sand. And nothing else.
If I end up in a healthy relationship because of this, I will NEVER forgive you!!!
I think I have to break up with him. I just cried, not moaned, screamed, etc, cried, with tears of sadness and disappointment when I came.
chasing tequila with frosting. best baby shower ever.
on the bright side i found your panties and the lid to the nutella
Just saw a commercial for non alcoholic baileys cream. WHAT THE HELL IS THE POINT?!
Randomize