I can hear the grilled cheese talking to me. "Let me in there!" they wanna get inside me
So he flipped me over and suddenly went limp then told me he was thinking about his ex.
so you punched his junk, right?
I woke up naked this morning there was a baseball bat on the floor the bathroom door knob was removed and the floor was wet. This is why i don't do Tequila shots.
The ice cream man just told me to use protection.
All i'm saying is it doesn't matter how drunk you were, at 26 years of age you should always remember to take down you pants before you shit in the toilet
YOHYFONSO!! YOU ONLY HAVE YOUR FIRST ONE NIGHT STAND ONCE!!
He slapped my ass and his clap-on light turned on.
I'm cutting her off I can't have my good name soiled with these kinds of shenanigans
Shit is preposterous
Only my second night back in town and I already have drunk middle aged women doing the robot around me in a circle.
Hungover playing piano at a baptism I am the PICTURE of class I feel like I should be struck by lightning
It might look like I curled my hair last night but it's just the jiz.
I was trying to come up with a reason why you shouldn't be naked in front of me, and now I have 'If you give a mouse a cookie" stuck in my head
I have never been that aroused while laughing my ass off in my life
I’ve been home 1 day and already had sex with my ex and got a blowie from her cousin and currently I’m getting molested by a cougar at the bar!!!! Plenty to give thanks for this year!!!!
If I don’t find a quality dick soon I’m going to beg the neighbor for another threesome with her and her husband. It’s like Covid killed all the quality penis Vegas normally has
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