It was then that he suggested we all nibble ears. A nibble circle.
so we were having anal, both very very drunk when he started shouting his roomates name
Only you could manage to look like a complete slut while wearing a turtle neck.
I just recycled a years worth of liquor bottles. I can feel my alcoholic carbon footprint shrinking
Jus posted an album so big that it takes my manhood into question
He told me all about his plan for proposing to his girlfriend as pillow talk.
I'm sorry but that single bed couldn't hold all five of us, especially with those boobs.
After we were done the second time she turned to me and called me a Hardcore Armadillo. Also, her O face involves crossed eyes. You tell me.
I don't know how we managed to stay up but we actually sat in front of her open refrigerator for god knows how long while she ate salami straight out of the package with her fingers and I laughed. It was a trainwreck.
Before he comes over remember the house standards. Ask yourself "will he stalk my sister or myself in the future?". If the answer is yes, then no, he isn't allowed.
Fell asleep in the library, woke up because I almost let out a sleep fart. That was close.
I'm willing to share. He can have sloppy seconds.
There's no good way to say, "sorry your son saw me naked on top of your brother"
I really don't think my body can handle another night of drinking
Lol you talk like you have a choice
I am worried that I am gonna die before the weekend is over
Im four hours late for work AND i pissed my bed
Randomize
