Singing into hair straightener during spice girls....sooo dangerous
Brutally Honest is my real middle name, Princess just sounds better.
Just checked my recent transactions online. Between the hours of 1 and 3am on September 30th, I went to 7/11 4 times. Unacceptable.
Are we responsible for the snowmen doing it doggy-style in my front yard?
A guy dressed like Jesus just gave me a mini keg. Prayers really do come true.
No, the responsible one does not yell out "lets go to iHop" at 5 in the morning to a bunch of drunk people with munchies.
On a scale of 1 to 3, with 1 being the smallest and 3 being the largest, what size nipple pasty do you think I am?
Hey! Where are you? It's Irrisponsible Patio time and you're not here firing shots down summer student's throats
DONT TALK SHIT ABOUT LUNCHABLES
Ask him to get me chedder bratwurst instead of the molly
Unless if you guys already left. Then I want the molly
Well I smoked some weird shit and I think I peed on my phone.
Shut up. I hate you. We're doing shots tomorrow. Fuck the consequences.
I literally heard an 'oh my god' when the shirtless Tongan appeared.
still drunk on my way to class to give my presentation on the negative affects of alcohol on the body. hell yes.
Im gonna start dry humping the manequins and see if i get fired.
Randomize
