That's intense
I've decided through careful research we can out drink any country folk.
i just smoke outta the biggest bowl i've ever seen. the kid was totally compensating for a tiny weeenie.
Its a sad when the highlight of your day is flicking a booger and actually getting it to stick to your computer monitor.
So I missed her say 'don't' before 'come in me'. She felt what was happening and freaked - which actually made the moment 100x better.
I was chocking and even did the sign for it..And you continued to just laugh
I honestly feel really bad for any girl with a period that lasts more than a day
Everything about that text makes me want to throttle you and cry
I think my boss gives me work off weekends because he doesn't want me showing up hungover anymore..
Spotify knows me way to well. You mention swinger club and guess what it shuffles to? Danger Zone by Kenny Loggins
so much tequila, so little girl.
If a cop comes up to me I'm whipping out my cock, swinging it around and singing the national anthem
I will take a ruler to your dick so help me god
What happened to you last night?
SO. MANY. SHOTS.
Wow i just puked in front of the lady that was drug testing me. I passed though!
You chugged Absolut from a beer bong. Why WOULDN'T you be a champion?
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