I thought this kinda shit only happens to ugly people
Watching a deaf couple have an argument in the mall. Can't bring myself to look away.
Walk-of-shaming home from Brooklyn in a Jesus costume that has "what wouldn't Jesus do" written on the robe.
as you might have guessed from my lack of texts, the herpes have calmed down.
Sounds good! I plan on writing a book entitled: I've Probably Done Cocaine In Your Bathroom. A tell-all by Lauren.
Bad idea to be in a car concussed. I just described his dick as an elevator. I think i meant escalator, i dont know
I will no longer accept nudes from you because I met your boyfriend last night and he seems like a nice guy
answer my text you professional douchebag
and i mean that in the cutest, flirtiest way possible
He called me kiddo. We can't have sex
It's hard to talk dirty with a mouth full of peanut butter
I wanna trust fall face first on a penis.
Now just crop his dad out and add it to the spank bank.
The squirrels were at the front door. Dude I swear..
he walked off and puked in the sand. then he made a sand castle over it so that "it wouldn't upset the kids"
Did April legit get married in a parking lot?
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