I am apparently in rockville maryland. I just threw up my tater tots I had fro brunch in a safeway parking lot. Then ordered a pizza. Pepperoni and pineapple. I'm sitting in the parking lot, next to my barf, waiting for my pizza. WOOF. Someone just gave me an oxycontin tab. Can u come get me? I'm scared
he had to fake a sneeze attack to hide the fact he came in 15 seconds?!
so its atleast an 8 for creativity.
You know the gilmore girls would be alright if it was on mute the whole time
Hillary is trying to make pickle pops with vodka and sell them to kids at the ball park.
She kept looking at me and saying "you are the scary high".
I am "lost the control of my head" high right now.
So lets not base feelings on vagina tingles
his daughter has his phone and goesss ohhh boobies and shows me a picture of my own tits...
Now I'm having a post-sex brownie. Is this the life? I think it might be
I Woke up still tied to the bed. I would say, it was a good night!
I'm shaking a cocktail while in bed. Is that bad?
why do i have a pole dance champion shot glass?
so hungover. idk whos house or comp im on
I have mastered the art of having sex on monkey bars.
Dude no i feel my liver disintegrating
Randomize
