May i just say it is extremely difficult to pee in a cape
he asked me if i wanted "a hit" off his inhaler. its definitely time for a new roommate
I may also break bread with strippers. Because it is passover.
you sat in the middle of your kitchen floor feeding your dog blueberries one by one
Makin mac and cheese without you. Definitely seem to do this better inside you. Splashed boiling water on my cock
You don't understand. He was so ginger that he could make red hair a dominant gene. And I refuse to torture my future spawn like that.
I think I was using my hair to catch my vomit last night.
You were.
I'll start choreographing the sperm rain dance now
Dude so coolest charity idea ever, think aids walk but instead of miles you drink beers oh the possibilities
I just woke up and my mouth tastes like I licked the bathroom floor in the last ghetto bar we were in. I'm going to get my mouth checked for chlamydia. Do I see a dentist for that?
so I guess I made a note in my phone last night to remind myself not to do shrooms on the cruise ship
I distinctly remember telling him "I'll suck your dick while you eat pizza"
Guess who isn't pregnant with a random sex ocean baby?!?!
Sex with you deserves a trophy and a day of remembrance in honor of it.
I tried making my own red bull with crushed up caffeine pills, bubbley water and flintstones chewable vitamins. The ER doctor sead I'm lucky to be alive.
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