Do you ever look at a vegetable and think "that would be awesome to shove up my vagina"?
Having sex with her is like doing taxes, Happens once a year and I usually end up paying.
Well look at it this way, if he should happen to get into a terrible accident within the next 2 days, its okay.. i have his dental records on my ass cheek.
Do you think it would be a good idea to mention in my admissions essay that I was the guy that streaked across the soccer field last year?
Just now remembered singing Trashy Women at the reception. Not karaoke, just sang along with the mic I stole from the DJ. All while still in my dress drinking champagne from the bottle
The whole movie was ruined when some chick started laughing with what you could tell was QUITE the mouthful. This of course made the guy laugh harder.
It's kind of like, standing in a garage and pretending you're a car. Except you're naked.
I SHITYOUNOT DAN JUST PUNCHED A DEER IN THE FACE. MID LEAP.
are you just inviting me because you can't afford an actual stripper?
i want to shrink myself down to penis size, climb inside of her pussy and just live there for a few months.
I was angry that a college kid had a new Audi
so I peed on it
last night i fell off a barstool and busted my nose. i can regretfully say that i didn't see cherub last night.
Thinking about licking your asshole. And hugs and stuff too I guess.
he told me that I'm basically going to be the mom of the house when they move in...i like to see it as being a MILF without the responsibility of real children
My brothers dog was hit by a car and died. They're really sad about it.
But they're having a baby! It's like a dog only 40 billion times worse!
Randomize