oh hey summer self, welcome to endless thirsty thursdays and walks of shame.
We gave a starfish gin and Lucky Charms. I think it enjoyed it. Best trip to the beach ever.
You couldn't hold yourhead up but you managed to unzip my zipper. That's skill..
Drunkenly auctioned off my bed for 3 tequila shots
Resolution for 2011: blow jobs are a privilege, not a right.
Apparently after taking body shots off of a guy i haven't seen since 1st grade, i ate a stick of butter, showed everyone my tampon string, and fell off the boat. my uggs belong to the sea now
I just bid on a $9000 car because I think its my ex-girlfriends. Yes I wanna hit that again.
I swear she looks like a sloth.... I'll toss a coin...
THE PRUIS IN YOUR DRIVEWAY IS NOT YOURS
excuse me?
I accidentally borrowed your spare keys a while ago...i just tried them...that, my friend, is not your car.
just like cleaning my room and being more organized in my life. more so just making sure a toaster doesn't end up in my car again for 2 months
He's a doctor now.. hope he can cure his small dick
At this point in job hunting, I'm willing to become a leather daddy if it means some sort of income.
I'm happy I peed in your laundry basket last night
I just lost my handcuff virginity and not in the sexy way.
If we both don't have awesome filthy sexual experiences to share in the morning...we are no longer best friends.
Randomize
