The 3 of us think it's time to start drinking.
3?
Me, myself and I
so the guy who showed me the apt today is now texting me and asking me out for drinks...he's at least 20 yrs oldr than me and highlights his hair, but part of me is wondering how low i can talk him down in rent during sex? wrong?
maybe tonight we can turn coloring into a drinking game
Im going to need an iv of taco bell after this.
the fda needs to get their shit together cause these four loko going away parties are gonna kill me
Are my feet made of real feet?
Either I put my underwear on inside out and wore it like that all day, or I had sex with him. Its sad I have to guess.
well that explains the french fry and ketchup packet rolled into the wasitband of my sweats. thank you drunk me.
So idk if it's because I'm working out again or the coke, but I hit my target weight today. Whaaaat uuuup. Come and get me thanksgiving.
scream really loud. we think you crawled under the deck
We're so stoned that were both cuddling on the couch and crying over Forest Gump while eating popcorn. She asked me if I'd fuck away the sadness. I think she's serious.
I just singed the hair in my nose trying to re-light a joint. now all i can smell is burnt hair. day ruiner
Hey sorry for calling you so much last night. I mixed your number with the pizza guys, and he was running late
I know you just got dumped by your gf but believe there is still good in the world. I just smoked a joint and took a fucking unbelievable poop. Give me a call tomorrow.
You offered the police officer a Snickers ice cream bar and cried when he wouldn't take it...
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