Be sure to let me know if your relationship crumbles so I can resume hitting on you
Just found a glow stick inside of my vagina..
With the amount of traffic your vagina gets, it was only a matter of time before someone threw a rave there.
i just unintentionally masturbated to my own facebook picture
Can we please stop calling your vagina the cave of wonders?
your drunk ass trust falled a guy double fisting bud limes and as a result your head bounced off the patio table. So that might explain the stitches on the back of your head.
i get the sense she is planing new and exciting ways to physically harm me during sex
you really cant fit homeless dj into your budget? doubles as charity
You're not supposed to support this behaviour, btw the judge recognized me
In the midst of you puking your guts out, you stopped, looked at the globe in front of you and whispered "America.."
Came so hard when I was riding him that I actually bit some of his chest hair off. He said I was the first girl ever to do THAT.
my phone went off during the middle of it and he ask what i was doing. he wouldn't let my reply with "your boss". ..
Most drunken moment of the night is me pouring Chanel no. 5 all over your boobs and rubbing it in...
Stop thinking about me and go on your date... at least I got the glitter off your face first.
I just bought a slurpee and condoms. God bless America.
I just deff did the walk of shame.. His roommate/manager woke us up. A dog scared me on my stumble to the car.
This is why I'm single.
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