Is making out on a toilet while he is sitting down and pissing weird? cause that's what happened last night
you just love her because she lets you bang her with fruits and veggies!
My family is watching Intervention and taking notes. I need to leave NOW!
Just got head while drinking hot cocoa and eating cookies. Never in my life have I felt more like santa claus
She stole my hamster. idk who she was, she just walked in and said she knew Keith so she stayed, drank 6 beers, and then stole Charles.
puking in a sink with a garbage disposal Fucking. Rules. It's like you're punishing your puke when you're done.
I've seen people win free drinks for a lot less dude, no need to drop trou on a piano.
I was told I sang Taylor Swift's entire discography in between violent bursts of green vomit before falling asleep in the bath tub
He initiated the conversation by sending me a picture of his penis at 4 am
On the flip side Weston asked if he could move me to Wisconsin to be his "moto hoe" which is actually a thing apparently
Way to go. Now you have no beer and I have a cold tit.
If we were teenagers we would intentionally be trying to burn down this historic landmark
it was weird going down on him. His picture of Jesus was staring at me the entire time...
Now, I know I say this a lot, but you've obviously never seen my penis.
holy shit! you were walking down a hill and just happened to be passing a trash can like 4 ft away and projectile vomited over a fence into the trash can. kept walking and drank a beer.
Randomize
