Where you at
assisting at a photo shoot in williamsburg till 7ish. wassup?
Doesn't matter. I already jerked off in your bed.
His friends call him "Gasm".... Im going for it.
dude, she was giving me a lapdance and her thong had a skid mark. no I did not hit it.
I'm the only kid serving jury duty. And I'm the only one who may walk out of here in handcuffs for a warrant. I'm enabling these people to doubt America's youth once again.
The bar posted my picture because my name changes with each new fake i get. i'm getting a wig.
He woke up, got my bottle of water and poured it on me and then went back to sleep. Not really how I want to wake up at 2 a.m.
I'm too hungover to crawl to the fridge so im eating the candy nipple tassels I got bought for Christmas
I love you more with every blowjob.
You should write for Hallmark.
Judging by my bruises, I know I took more than one tumble. I probably pulled u down w me, and then punched you in the knee. Been trying to find a place to fix my phone between naps today. Almost no place accepts hand js as currency these days. 2013 is gonna be expensive and whorey.
Come back I feel like I ticking time bomb of
of drugs
School starts Thursday. Don't fling yourself out of the car to throw up screaming "classy" before I park this time.
It's a new year.
I don't know what song to play at my bong's funeral!
So, my love of dick may have landed me in a cult. On the bright side, I now have a discount at Spencer's.
He can kiss the multicultural 3 some goodbye
Went to bed in my room fully clothed, woke up naked in the kitchen with the dog looking unamused.
Randomize
