On ecstasy, in Ikea. this is incredible.
He adopted an old drug sniffing dog so that he won't lose his weed around the house anymore. It works.\n
idk what id do withouhrh yoy btro
Sorry, but you probably shouldn't come over. I'm too sober for this.
Come on Nikki god gave you a vagina for a reason, so you could tell guys what kind of shots to buy you
I woke up and watched my kitten suck on his nipple. Way too hungover to intervene. He thought it was me, so he just giggled and mumbled "mmm girl."
Seriously? God I hope he wasn't lactating.
......... Poor kitty
its amazing there are so many photos of me and him separately, since most of that party time was spent sneaking away to fuck upstairs...
Your children are clinging to me like my teets are full of bountiful milkiness. They're driving me nuts. I felt my uterus shrivel up.
Thank you for letting me get drunk enough to forget he was there tonight, but not drunk enough to make a complete fool of myself.
YOU TRIED TO SWIM IN HER FISHTANK. I don't think she's going to call you.
Thanks for being my pregnancy scare Sherpa...
MESSY REBOUND SEX HERE I COME! Time to start stretching to fit in my back seat again ...
He came home at 2 AM on roller skates with his hair dyed pink while singing "Sweet Transvestite" and throwing glitter on all of us and everything we own. We had to call a cleaning guy.
The day I let him eat me out will be the day that Donald trump is an honest, kind, non-bigoted member of society
He burst in the bathroom while I was peeing to hand me my beer I was looking for earlier tht night. And my pants were already down so I thought why not
Randomize