We all just poured out a sip of our drinks for you. One for our pussy whipped homie.
So you know how craigslist used to have an "erotica" section? And how after you click on a link it changes a darker color? And how Dad stays up really late most nights?
Oh god... well at least he's gettin some. Mom's a prude.
In hindsight, trust falling your grandma was a bad idea. Sorry about that.
Are you pissed because you didn't get action, or the fact i got boned twice in public places tonight?
we just got kicked out of the mexican restaurant. i have a full pitcher of margarita's hiding under my coat.
And i didn't ask you to do that, You showed your penis at your own free will.
You kicked in the door when she was blowing him. You dont remember do you?
Night is still young. Puking guts out part of it just began
i've eaten like 19 popsicles... what the fuck have you done today?
How high are you?
I feel like breakfast can just fly into my mouth
omg this is getting ridiculous. nobody's vagina should ever be this neglected.
I'm not even pretending to study anymore. I'm straight up sleeping in the library
As we have told you before, the first rule of hook-up bingo is we don't talk about hook-up bingo
I'm sorry you're hurting. Would a picture or my erect penis help?
oh i see... well this is a positive first step in you courting him for sex.
Randomize
