big game today.. looking forward to seeing that magic win, and then i will celebrate with a nude dip in lake Eola.. anyone else in??
i justawanted to let you know that illi aalways be thwew for ui and o qill waasag youer dog whenebvet u wsnt
I don't understand why we need a holiday to become more aware of boobs...
Christmas on farmville was waaaaay better than my actual Christmas.
I want to frame my negative pregnancy test.
Would you even take no as an answer? I have a feeling you see it more as a challenge.
You know your high, when your chugging applesauce out of the jar with no utensils.
Def just hooked up with my brother's senior prom date in his bed. Does that make me the worst brother ever?
Naw, the sex dungeon had to come down so we could build a nursery. Cause and effect really.
I straight up told your dad I've slept with a majority of your family
I only get hit on by people going through their midlife crisis. Yes, I did purposely write that gender neutral.
All I'm saying is that if he knows his wife walks around naked during the day, he shouldn't bring a friend home for lunch and show up unannounced.
I need you to teach me how to be roommates with somebody I'm not fucking.
I thought accidentally shaving off my fingertip while trying to shave my butthole was going to be the most unexpected part of my day, but no
I'm all about clean living these days
You started your day with fried chicken and a bloody
... after you woke up in your own urine
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