I don't understand how people can have that much vomit in them
just heard a tri-delta girl talking about her drunken escapades last weekend...it's like the exact plotline to a hardcore porno.
remember last year when i left for the bar in flip flops and came back in heels?
it happened again.
He's Hawaiian. Thank god it wasnt a real American
There r osticjed everywhere
Just had to pull out another loan to pay for that public drunkenness citation. I am so ready to graduate.
After throwing up, the toothpaste tasted so good. Thank you for not letting me eat it.
Dude, it could be so much worse. That Dale kid lost a toe I think.
Hangover or death. Death. I'll have a slice of death please.
I got punched in the face by a Cowboy last night. Then he bought me a beer cause o convinced security not to kick him out the bar. Start of a fairytale love story? I think so.
You tried to pay for our cab with the 2 dollars you got from selling your natty ice outside the strip club.
YOUR DICK HAS BEEN IN ME I DO NOT WANT TO BE SET UP TO MEET YOUR FRIENDS
Let's just say that in a last ditch effort to avoid getting arrested I said to the cop "but I'm not even that drunk" and he proceeded to point out (in front of a crowd) that I had "fucking pissed my pants"
he just sent me a dick pic, it highly resembled a cheese stick
Unintionally got shitfaced at study group this week. The waitress brought out a fishbowl of long Island iced tea. Challenge accepted.
Randomize