I just got really nervous and swallowed all of my birth control
Omg just want to confirm: got drunk, naked in street, fucked in bathroom and puked on bart.
I have all these new brothers and sisters I'm just now finding out about
I'm done trying to be a vegetarian. My vagina smells like hummus.
Its 4 am and he honestly tried throwing pizza at his ceiling for decorations
Threesome in a minivan. New low
Also, ran into my neighbor across the street. He told me about scheduling his vasectomy. We are officially way beyond the acceptable point for asking his name again.
no dude I'm not doing anything bad to her...remember she's always the DD she has blackmail material on literally all of us
At our floor meeting the RA was talking about bathroom hygiene and I really wanted to be like "what about shower sex."
Valid question
Anxiously awaiting my period drinking Hershey's syrup from the bottle. Don't judge me
Really? A fat girl?
I'm walking her back. Chill out.
She is a nice girl okay. For some reason we are in my room though.
ABOUT TO MAKE THE BIGGEST MISTAKE OF MY LIFE, SEND HELP
Have fun and good luck.
who gets drunk at chipotle by noon and then gets kicked out? this chick.
YOU ATE THE FUCKING GOLDFISH!?
I'm fucked-out. That state of being high between fucked up and passed out.
Randomize
