Who has a tranny cab driver? I have a tranny cab driver.
you guys are cousins why the FUCK are your pants off
What's the wine called that we really like and we usually drink it with xanax?
Good news.. I found out what I did Saturday night. Bad news... I found out what I did Saturday night.
she blew me in the men's room in the restaurant. it was a french bistro, so it was okay
I can't come tonight. Someone took a shit in the dressing room. A.) Clean it up or B.) Kill myself. Text back with your answer.
Sup man, did you have a 3way this month if so it would be 3 for 3 for the house
A check for $9 that I used to buy six boxes of Girl Scout cookies bounced. I think I've hit a new low.
New fact of life: getting Becca high never helps any situation at all ever.
I never want to even look at fireball again because it reminds me of the night I died and then lived to tell the tale of how I died.
I'm 2 weeks in to my all dick and carb diet and so far I've lost 2lbs.
Look, if this is a cop, just lemme know that Mike is ok. Fuckin all star game
Last thing I remember I was riding on a picnic table being hauled around by a lawn mower with an empty case of bud light on my head...
It's a classy one I promise! Their toilets are cushioned an tier wifi is named hummingbird
i dont know how or why im in the gym right now, but theres a hot cop, a guy i hook up with, and his hot friend. this can only lead to every fantasy i ever had.
Randomize