is wine microwaveable?
What'd you guys eat?
Literally everything that was frozen.
Your one and only job is to make sure I am on that bus tomorrow morning with no cat makeup on my face
thinking back, the fact that our bartender was missing a finger shouldve been hint number one not to let him pick our drinks
i had to sit with a fan pointed directly to my vag for a good 10 minutes
I cannot take someone's straight and gay virginity in one threesome. It's just too much responsibility.
We are getting high tomorrow and being statues at the cafeteria. Come find us.
Single person behavior: I wanted a cookie but was too lazy to make or go buy any, so I let cookie dough ice cream melt and ate all the chunks. Pantsless.
Drinking games this Saturday as usual although the ice cube tray game is banned due to last weeks incident
Dude. Cab ride home consisted of me making out with an Asian girl sitting next to my Dad
I applaud your efforts, but I have to say it was the bear we encountered that ultimately shut down the entire operation
We've started traveling with Michael and Patrick so we can pretend we're two legit straight couples.
A charade that fell apart the second another couple on the cruse found Sarah face down in my box on an observation deck.
Ever wonder what all the drugs you've ever done would look like put together?
Heaven. . It would look like heaven
what the fuck is wrong with you
Do you want me to go chronologically or alphabetically?
You said the best orgasm you ever had, you gave to yourself. your boyfriend looked really disappointed. so did half the room.
Randomize
