I'm not really sure actually. until I fell in love with a boy (which was just a few weeks ago) I thought my attraction to men was purely physical.
so you were gay...and then you realized you were EVEN MORE gay
At the bar. Guy comes up wearing a hollister shirt and says "lets blow this popsicle stand"
You fucking left with him didn't you?!
Ever have a poop and think... that has no business coming out of a human? Like it looks like a sick dog's or a ferral animal's?
this weekend will be like the season finale to my life
I thought his dick was headless. then I pulled back the foreskin.
No worries you cant actually turn into a wine snob if you brew it in your closet....
He left me a five minute voicemail apologizing for chasing me with a meat beater. I'm actually not sure what that means.
You might not want to come home tonight. Mom just found your vibrator and now she won't stop sobbing and holding a framed picture of you as a little kid.
We did it in the bathroom in Taco Bell. We didn't buy anything before we left, which I thought was rude.
My goal this weekend is to get a number that goes with the penis I take him.
Aspirations
our friendships a beautiful delicate flower...that has been crushed by peni
Hey. Make all the seamen/semen jokes you want. Not many people can say they fucked 2 different girls in two different countries in one week on a tax free bonus. Next up: Italy.
I talked to the pizza guy for 10 minutes about my truck, I don't even have a truck
So it's official the pockets of my work apron exist solely for the purpose of secretly flipping off asshole customers and not losing my job.
sexting just seems like too much work right now.
Randomize
