ad ew i am wasted whats my problem
"You squeeze, we tiip biiiiiig" JB
when you close your eyes do you see, that mystical creature will be me.
who is this?
if your phone is working sorry i called you at 2am. if it is not then i never called your phone at 2am
Brogan sounds similar to Bridget...sorta.
Every girl's name is automatically translated to "Baby/Milk Carrier" in my brai
I am full of burrito and curiosity
remember earlier when I said I was over sex with random boys? take it back take it back take it back
Umm you don't wanna know how many "I'm sorry for calling you last night" fb wallposts I just had to write...
he sent me a picture of his dick with a heart border around it
I don't even know why im sitting in this office eating a poptart.
Okay, I just got to our real hotel and the YMCA may have been a better choice. A man w/ no shirt on
I choose McDonald's breakfast at 1:28am over sex anytime
I just got a girl to make out with me just by saying "get at me." Get at me
They're the one who can profit the most when given the opportunity for blackmail.
At least that's how I've always seen it whenever I've been the Designated Driver.
That simultaneously explains everything and makes me very very terrified of you.
dude idk where I am. fuckin like. there wheat field and a horizon and shit. I think I got on a bus? some dude named Sam gave me a pamphlet about Jesus.
Randomize
