I bet him anal if they won...the one time Detroit decides to win, it had to be this week
I just spent an unhealthy amount of money overnighting a full adult sized Trix Rabbit Halloween costume
I think my goal in life now is to be a Trending topic on Twitter after I die.
You stole a frozen pizza from the freezer, stuffed it in the back of your shirt then proceeded to leave the party.
I am getting drunk. And i'm going to paint my face and slide down the stairs like Pochahontas. Goodbye
So, I was thinking... Since this restraining order doesn't go into affect until monday, that leaves us 5 days to wreck his world.
Would I be bad if I bought a pregnancy test at shoppers the same time I hand in a resume? Or do you think it would get me the job?
Just found the last picture of me as a virgin. Framed it.
I just want you to know that I think it is hilarious and wonderful that 40s are now your alcohol of choice.
You were drunk it couldn't have been that bad
I've never been drunk enough to enjoy getting a blister on my dick.
Before we have sex for the first time I would like "eye of the tiger" to be playing to mentally prepare me for what I'm about to endure.
So I'm getting really old. I feel asleep for a booty call that I initiated. The struggle is real.
I went home with him again and he LEFT HIS OWN HOUSE at 2 in the morning while I was IN THE BATHROOM.
I'm a stupid stupid woman who is totally going to rock this holiday season dick drunk on that Ginger
you were on a whole other level. you went home with him because he said "you got some light ass eyes"
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