why is there a picture of someone wearing Tevas with socks taped on the wall?
I woke up naked by my window. blinds open. smiley face drawn on my window.
can i drink enough to forget this semester even happened?
how do i tell him I'm always in the mood without sounding like a slut?
She saved the condom from the first time we did it.
I was masturbating with the shower head and someone flushed the other toilet. Pretty sure I have 3rd degree burns on my clit.
I had to physically pry the rocks out of your hands so you wouldn't throw them at the guy with the cowboy hat. You probably would've missed anyways.
ERIN AND I ARE GETTING MATCHING VIBRATORS. I'M PEER PRESSURING YOU INTO JOINING THE CLUB. Besides we're the three best friends that anyone could have, you better not ruin that by being a pussy and not treating your pussy to awesomeness. That is all.
Sometimes I think I'm witty and funny, and then I realize it 3pm and I'm drunk
Well you finally jumped into that tree you've always wanted into and some girl gave you an 8.5. You were very happy.
So i stood up out of the sunroof while he gave me oral. Car was still moving. Exactly how illegal is that?
I'm driving to his house to eat chicken and hopefully have an orgasm
Drunk in my hotel room, eating taco bell, and crying at Nicki Minaj's life story.
This is why I keep you in my life.
I woke up in nothing but my socks and my hat a cigarette in my mouth and a beer in my hand..........GREAT NEW YEARS
I'm gonna write a book entitled "when you give a cop a cookie..."
I don't even want to know.
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