I think the best way to start out any day is to watch 80's music videos. It's like visual wheaties.
You just kept saying over and over "Tell me I won't do it." Someone finally told you you won't. You did. Welcome to herpes.
just saw a guy throwing up in the urinal at Dennys. Either he had one hell of last night or we are going to eat somewhere else
I have to stop envisioning penises as dragons.
After he finished he proceeded to check my boobs for breast cancer.
Another reason why I like dubstep now, it makes me feel even higher than I already am.
Well I don't think you can suck his dick while he's making pizza. I think that goes against some health codes.
I reek of vagina.. My cab driver commented.
you were angry and didn't have anything else to throw so you threw a breakfast burrito...?
I told my manager that I would be coming in to work either high from edibles on purpose or tripping on acid by accident so he knows to check my work tomorrow.
THERE ARE SO MANY HOT DADS AT WHOLE FOODS
I want you to defile me in my childhood bed.
so i might have slept on your bathroom floor last night...
I know right, I would blow him just for the satisfaction he would taste like vodka
He broke through his window then signed his name on the biggest peice of glass from it. I think they framed it and named it 'best party ever'
Randomize
