I told my new friends about my possible new chin. They said I should get my nose done first. Please tell me I'm pretty or something.
do you ever lay in the bath and watch the blood hit the water?
EWW. Don't discuss your period with me. You can go shave your back now.
we're making bets on your personal life
the higher we get, the more he looks like ray charles.
Using 'equal to a modern day cock block" in term paper, inappropriate
I know, but I was really high and I felt like a failure dragon because I could only blow smoke, no fire.
I swear my vagina formed calluses just to deal with how big he is
I'm going to get pregnant and die... Mean Girls warned me about this but I didn't listen
We stayed up until 4:20 AM. The next thing I remember was waking up at 4 PM, like my internal alarm clock knew.
You're either a hooker or Beyonce. Beyonce is abnormally good at doing everything in heels
I think I won over his best friend. He was staring at my boobs all night.
I think you should just bang him and get it out of your system.
That's what you say about everyone.
I'm smoking a bowl with matches and a candle while my mother washes dishes downstairs. I thought adulthood was supposed to be different.
Our relationship revolved around Taylor Swift albums. It's no wonder it ended so fast
Hypothetically speaking, if a girl asks you to fuck her wearing only your hockey helmet, is that socially acceptable?
Randomize
