party is dying down. we just wrote whore in the yard with gas. Photos to come.
I think I just saw the travelocity gnome in leather chaps.
at this rate if someone im actually interested in likes me back im going to die of surprise before i even get to make out with them
i can't believe i had a foursome before a threesome
you were saying "i am the vodka queen!" and then in a different voice replying to yourself "all hail the vodka queen! you are so beautiful!"
he just came in and straightened the chair and left again
do you know how much drugs we can buy now that you got that raise at work
You come home the day the world is supposed to end. Well played Mayans.
Don't talk to me about scholarly dedication until you've taken a final in boxers, a bloody tank top and a zip tie to hold your hair back. I wear the most sullied 4.0 crown of all time....
Bake him heart shaped cookies?!? Send him a picture of your tits like an ADULT!
ugh... fuck pirate breakfast. my head is like thirsty.
I want to die, ON THAT, with that INSIDE ME. ironically, I sense that would be the only time I'd feel alive.
I stole the butter cup cuz i brought home my rolls and chicken and didnt want the butter everywhere. I miss your body because its amazing.
I promised to leave my panties on but I didn't promise to not have sex
I'm just trying to figure out the reason why humans wear socks....
Randomize
