More tranny stories later!
I would really like to get high with Bill Nye. I'm being dead serious. Every step I take is literally a step I take because it will take me closer to Science Guy high.
We could get him to build Inspector Gadget.
I didn't know you were high TOOOO!!!
Well his aunt was in the next room so we had to be quiet. I felt like i was on an episode of silent library.
yeah except there is a correlation between drinking moonshine and going blind, which kind of concerns me
She wants an explanation of my cousins creepy foot fetish with my god sister. i don't know how I can sum this up in a text.
I got used. This is the happiest day of my life. I was just a huge cock and that is all she needed.
Why not. Its my b-day, you're in town, I'm in town, bars are in town, and alcohol is in town. I don't see anything not good about those things.
I'm blaming hurricane Irene if I get pregnant tonight.
Just talked to Kate. She said I called her on Friday night. She said I was crying for 5 minutes because we were parked in front of a fire hydrant.
Things are burning & the world smells of peanut butter. It's beautiful.
If I don't get my shit together, I'm going to be one of those really fucked up cases on 1000 ways to die
My liver is preforming stress tests.
I hummed the theme from jaws while she was taking the pregnancy test....needless to say she was not pleased
I miss seeing you
i hope for the sake of your safety you were not with your girlfriend while sending texts like that at 3 am
I love random hookups in covid sex. Usually girls think me about a one and a half to a two and a half but now that I got this mask on I'm a Solid 6.
Randomize
