I didn't realize how hung over I was until I rolled over and the world rolled over with me.
I wish we had a justin bieber to wanna fuck when we were younger... But noooo we just had hanson
i just learned how to squirt via google. life is good.
I have teeth marks. Like distinct upper and lower jaw.
Yeah me too. My shoulder looks rabid.
I kept feeling my boobs..just to make sure they were still there.
apparently you can't crawl through the drive-thru window
Has now officially visited every ER in this city in one semester.
idk but i have you stored in my phone as 'guy with beard doing body shots'
Home safe. Psyche shattered. Still rolling. In love with the morrocan rug in the living room.
Just thought you should know the man you CHOSE to father your children has once again fallen asleep on the toilet. thanks mom
Well, let's see..I held him while he cried for 30-40 minutes, woke up on his couch AND he gave me a ride home in his underwear. Shit show is not even the half of it.
I'm gonna eat you out with that hat on so it looks like beaker's doing it. And I'm gonna go "memememememe"
I stopped his blowjob to raise 3 fingers & whistle the hunger games tune to the people walking past the window
Came up to an intersection and someone was blasting My Chemical Romance at like 9 AM. They're DEFINITELY having a good day
Just because I'm asexual doesn't mean I can't have a revenge fuck.
Randomize
