I only want to know people that are dynamic intelligent and totally insane
i spent 15 mins trying to take money out of ATM with my drivers license saying, "what the fuckkkk" everytime it didnt work
we were dressed as cave people and he kept telling everybody i was so easy a caveman could do it.
I can't be drunk. Sober yes. Drunk no. Spoonfuls
All she was asking was for you to describe your coat so she could get it, but you kept yelling at her so the security threw you out.
Was this before or after he told that homeless man outside the bar about his past sexual experiences?
walking back to the dorm.. she is flashing evryone, demanding beads. we tried to stop her and now she just keeps yelling "Bourbon st bitchesss"... you get her tomorrow
He broke up with his gf yesterday so he could give me our annual Christmas sex at midnight.
Marry him. Now.
I saw a kid peeing outback so I yelled "you have a small pecker, but its ok cuz when life gives you lemons..." and proceeded to throw lemons at him
Not a or good or bad impression, just that you were all basically naked playing beer bong in sombreros and ties. Casual.
Two really nice girls helped clean the taco out of my hair.
Plus my fingers were hella swollen from eating all these cured meats so it was like I was given it to her with Hulk Hands on
Getting high with your mom, but thinking of you!
What, That's like a total 7 inches of cock and 6 are from Joe. Don't be mad at me because you had the lamest orgy ever.
It's official we're now working from home permanently. I'm getting paid to have sex and sandwiches. I hit the lottery.
Randomize
