How come twittering sounds sexual?
Because of Bambi.
I just called a phone sex line and you know what I did? I sat there and cried
we need to get ahold of those "sexting" teens on tyra. HAWT!
wasnt one 13?
Just tried to fight the dj at cowboys because he would'nt play freebird. Pick me up now.
I don't know if this beer pong partnership can last if you refuse to look me in the eye when we make sweet sweet clutch cup at the same time.
Just ordered an appetizer sampler to distract the fat chicks so we can escape
Asking the cop for directions wearing a lion mask may not have been my best moment...
I honestly think the worst part about the night is they just kicked us out of the park and we didn't even get to go into Disneyland Jail
Champagne pong turned into an expensive and painful experience.
Well since your going through her phone..look man she loves you..she just loves my dick more
Either sorry for fondling you Saturday or thank you for letting me fondle you Saturday.
I couldn't drink enough to fuck the friend, you said challenge accepted and stole some chicks shot.
At first I was a little embarrassed for sharting, but then i realized it was a bachelor party, and I went balls to the wall
Heard you were the one that shit off Jamie's balcony. FYI there is a cabbie down here out for blood
Just participated in the saddest thing: Cheetos. Handjob. I have lost at life
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