First off: I'm drunk so fuck you. Second: you weren't a bad girlfriend. Tres: thats 3 in spanish. Number 4: fuck 3 Doors Down
Should I go home with him even though I know my Run DMC undies have skid marks on them?
Best moment of my life. I just got a text from some random number that said i can't wait to touch you. Her name is kiara and she had the wrong number.
you insisted on breathalizing me with a inhaler.
Just got a free shot w my beer...it's not quite 11am yet...I love international travel. These people aren't judgmental.
First week back and I made to one class, its gonna be okay after all.
Did I get stoned on a sunday afternoon and speak to someone on the phone for an hour about cats and their behaviour? Glad you asked. And yes.
holy fucking shit get me out of here. even the babies are wearing beanies
I'm sorry about all of the innappropriate shoe throwing
I'm content with our "friends with accidental benefits" situation.
So I should just walk in, look him in the eye and say, "I just came to fuck your brother, nice to meet you" and just walk to your room.
You would critique a dick pic. Damn art people.
WHY IS THERE A GOLD FISH IN MY BONG??
Who the fuck just called me and played funkytown
Do you think he’ll fall in love with me if I tell him I have a nickname for his penis
Randomize
