East Village: Only place you can play pac man while eating a pineapple hotdog, go to the bar next door and see a graphic blowjob on every tv
Dry humping a girl for an hour and then jizzing in your pants doesn't count as losing it.
So you coming over for some grilled cheese and head?
we drove through mcdonalds and ordered everything on the dollar menu. We told the workers that were making Super Size Me 2, drove away without paying and told them to bill our producer.
I am currently sitting on a candy bar to warm it up cause it was in the fridge so I can eat it while watching the last song and smoking weed by myself
She was throwing my stuff away and then before I knew it she was sucking my dick. It was like some fucked up sour patch kids commercial
It was about the point the universe collapsed in on itself and I was a singularity of insanity that I realized I was tripping balls.
I want you to come over here and spit coffee in my mouth like a momma bird feeding a baby bird. That hung over.
From the same High Brittany who brought you such thoughts as, "Fuck, am I wearing shoes?" Comes High Brittany on a date! Stay tuned. This will be interesting.
Unless you can blow me and bake me a pie at the same time, im not impressed.
Just sent my cousin to buy me a new bra cause mine is zip tied to a bar in the middle of nowhere Iowa
I am not exagerating when I say the thought "screw you future me" actually just went through my head
I'm on the fast track to lesbian land
whatever. i don't need to be drunk to tell you i'd suck your dick if you had one.
Fuck you and fuck your stupid hat
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