i threw up in a trash can last night at kellys irish times. but in a trash can because i'm a lady
I think I should become a real estate agent in th friend zone I know the place so well
can you explain how you are here for one night and now my kitchen table is in 11 pieces..
I'm going to knit you a pair of furry handcuffs. And you said that knitting class was dumb.
The last thing I remember is pushing my way into the bathroom and dumping a 40 on him. We havent talked since.
wow, you never really realize how many muscles you have in your crotch until you pull them all.
Just make sure my intervention has a theme...
If my mom walks in on me masturbating one more time I'm moving out
You'd think the first few times would have been enough
It was good. Ended up having a 3 hr make out session with her
What is this high school
There was a lot of catching up to do bro
hell or highwater he WILL get a blowjob in the hammock before the end of summer.
The moment when you and your BFF compare frequently used emojis and realize you have similar mental disorders and a really weak alibi.
I think I kinda scared him when I tried to wrap his snake around his dick while he was trying to nap.
she keeps trying to brush her hair with leaves and insisting she's not high
You know you're more responsible when you turn down your bed and make a clear path to it before you go out..
The last thing I remember was them slipping shots into my beer bong, and me being happy about it
Randomize
