I've had that scene from "Parenthood" where Rick Moranis' character is singing "Close To You" to his wife in classroom, stuck in my head all morning.
I guess my mind is just wondering whatever happened to Rick Mornais.
i think i just heard my dad finish in the other room...
he was fingering me, then looked down and said "i like your socks"
what part of 'taking a night off' includes MDMA in your world?
then she kicked a hole in her own door and the next thing you know, brian's walking up to her room with power tools. in no condition to use them
That's unfortunate. Distance can be a stoner's greatest enemy.
You make it sound like a battle for Middle Earth.
We now only communicate via Xbox messages. Living together is so easy
Some days you just pee in a stairwell and go home.
I am making it a rule that only people I am comfortable around enough to not have to put a bra on are allowed for Sunday funday. I think that's a good rule for someone who started drinking alone at noon while everyone else here sipped their coffee.
I changed my birth control schedule so that I'm on my period while you're gone this week
I don't deserve you.
Says the girl who left her friends to go have phone sex in the bathroom at Michael's
I ate so much cake that I can't even enjoy a blowjob
That's the most first world problem I've ever heard in my life.
When I came out of the bathroom you were naked dead asleep on the couch but your dick was still rock hard standing straight up. I almost took a pic. It was impressive.
I remember walking into a bathroom stall that had a couple fucking in it and giving them a condom and a thumbs up and then leaving
Is it still sex if there's no nudity, no orgasms, but the neighbors bang on the wall and ask you to stop? I've honestly forgotten.
Randomize
