Just assessed the damage in the bath. Two love bites. One bruise on the inner thigh. Strange awareness of what i'm assuming is my cervix. I've definitely missed you. x
Yeah. I realized I have a weakness for drugs and I need to move somewhere where I don't know how to find them.
how bad is she
captain morgan with tits
I meant to thank you again for giving up a potential interracial threesome to come to my party. I'm glad you stayed!
Update is I am officially king of Gettysburg. Tam and I are being threaded like royakt. In bought e ruined a drink
The lady at target couldn't scan my grocery item and just looked at me and said "just take it. I hate this fucking place". Best munchie adventure yet.
I really have to stop having sex with people I sell drugs to...it feels unprofessional
what a fun peer-pressure-filled weekend
I wish university was like frosh week all the time and then they just give you a degree for surviving
I don't remember how I broke my nose last night, but I woke up with dried blood everywhere. Also, you should tell that guy how you feel.
I was drunk while I accepted my job offer. Here's to growing up.
You were drunk at 5 You went to the dining hall and cried because your brain and fingers weren't working. Your RA came up to you and suddenly you became sober. I was very proud of you.
We drunkenly built a couch fort and fucked in it. I've known her since preschool. This was every childhood fantasy mixed with adult dreams come true.
Just don’t be like me and break up between Christmas and NYE and then get blackout on NYE and puke in your undies.
You aaa... you ever forget to wipe your ass?
Randomize
