Who do you think planted the wheat? Who do you think cleared the land and killed off the native inhabitants? Women?
I think I just made patron unclassy I bought limes at a gas station and for salt we are using gas station packets of salt
he has 3 profile pictures up and all of them are him riding jet skis
my stepmom is let-the-dog-eat-out-of-her-mouth drunk. oh my god.
we have what I like to call an assload of ramen noodles
Welcome to the difference between being FWBs (remember how we used to see who could get more lap dances a night?) and being in a relationship. Fun, huh?
Between the puerto rican elf, the fat marine, the deaf guy and the ex coke head I've got a good preview if the men in this city...
I made out with a dude last night who has an ex wife. Is this what post grad life is about?
i can trust myself, just not when im drunk. and drinking is my favorite pastime
And thanks! There are perks to polyamory. And birthday orgies are one of them
I fell asleep giving a handjob, had a sex dream about giving a handjob, and woke up giving a handjob. Life.
For a guy who came before his dick was out of his pants, he gave surprisingly good head.
I realize my mistake but don't you dare school me in cock, young man
Would it defeat the purpose of a run if I ran to McDonalds?
really enjoying the fact I don't remember how the staff party ended. feel like I need to shame drink today
feel at noon?
Randomize
