She had a bottle of NAIR in her bathroom, but she clearly hadn't been using it.
the girl I was having sex with just mumbled victory for msu during sex. i love basketball season
So I fucked that hot french guy last night
You do know he's the one who threw up on our table, right? You get to clean it up.
I truly don't know anything about sober relationships. Normally I would just drunkenly yell "sex?" in a guy's face. What do I do now? Be like, sooo uhhh, wanna do it? Awkward, and even worse, I will remember clearly just how awkward it was.
Is waterboarding an exceptable way of getting sober?
isn't that the guy who always buys you drinks?
yeah. i love a man who still buys me drinks after the bar cuts me off.
next time on intervention
Almost threw up on my grandmother as she walked in the house. Had to run to the bathroom and vomit my brains out. Prolly getting taken out of the Will now.
Best feedback on my performance so far: "There are things that can't be unseen."
I'm so cold without your freakishly high body temperature
that's the equivalent to a normal girlfriends. 'I miss you' btw
We took a walk on the beach after the bar, he held my hand and kissed me. And then I peed under a lifeguard stand. It was so romantic.
I didn't even mind that he came early I just wanted to get eaten out and cuddle
Might call you tomorrow on a drunken hate filled rant, or just a normal hate filled rant, either way be ready.
I used my mad pharmacist skills to turn ordinary birth control into morning after. I think my professors would be proud.
For a second I thought he was going to give me an intervention
You can't give interventions in a bar!
hey, cheif big dick, where the fuck are my panties.
Randomize
