Is it bad to mix sunny d with vodka if i dont have any real OJ?
I've mixd ketchup with vodka before and called it a bloody mary, so, no.
just come out here and I will go home with you...
I really need to stop carrying a flask around with me in my backpack at school..
Aren't you in 8th grade?
9th, but that's not the point.
my three year anniversary of no dick sucking is coming up. you can throw me a party with a penis cake.
I feel I need to conquer him. He's six ft eight and 265lbs. Its like the mount Everest of sex.
Thursday nights need to stop happening to me.
We ate a mysterious delivered pizza which no one ordered and then the wii wouldn't work so 20 of us watched porn on two laptops. Drunk took the awkward away.
i think she just faxed a picture of her vag from the office copy machine... i mean what kind of sexting is that... wait is that even legal???
I just spent my entire state tax return on sex toys
While leaving the bar with another guy I told the bouncer I was sad his friend had a fiancee
You were drinking Everclear weren't you?
He went snooping and now he's all intimidated by my super amazing box of sexy time toys.
Please stop calling it that.
Tomorrow I need you to slap me in the face. I'll explain then
Tonight I researched being a phone sex operator and teaching English at a French school in Africa. I think my future lacks direction
Hahahaha. He sent me a dick snap in the lululemon stockroom. What is life. If this works out, this could benefit everyone....
Puking out the window is really hard when you're the one driving.
Randomize
