omh. i just found SHIT IN THE SHOWER! who the fuck does that? and why do i always seem to find it?
we'll hang out once this whole, "your friends are robbers and drug addicts" thing blows over with my parents.
so id say it was a successful trip...i only got hit on by one cousin...
Yeah like at least with a penis what you see is what you get with a vagina there can always be a surprise inside
thought i was the most hungover person in class until i saw a kid puke into his bookbag...he wins
Just had a thought: were the sirens on when we were in the ambulance?
u kept pointing at random guys and making quacking or mooing sounds.
Your cousin just asked the bartender to start a round of vagina shots. Not body shots. Vagina shots. We're taking her out more often.
So the guy who is making our IDs is in jail now for attempted murder, with no bail...
So no fakes?
Tonight, I'll be cleaning. And by cleaning, I mean drinking booze and spraying everything with Febreze.
On a side note Tyler is buying beer from a gas station in a panda suit priceless
Just witnessed a fat waitress doing whipits in the back of a waffle house.. my life seems a little brighter..
I'm taking ecstasy it's gonna be that kind of Vegas trip
I'm getting high with a 50 year old car wash guy. Enough said.
I walked in describing her boobs thinking I was talking to you only to hear dad say 'I remember when your moms were like that'. ALWAYS tell me when they get home early. Always
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