I'll pay for our taxi if you let me makeout with the drummer and we don't leave RIGHT when the bassist does.
Ahhh... Adderall running out my nose in the shower really brings back memories.
"romantic friends" sounds more classy then friends with benfits
She fell onto my light and broke all four plants. I don't care how good the blowjob was.
At least drunk you showered before switching sex partners last night.
Just had a memory of you pretending to be a begging dog putting your head on my lap while I fed you. Great night to try a new drug.
they call him the transporter because he'll be your designated driver in exchange for sufficient weed or sex.\n
what about money
no - he has a code he lives by
You insisted we help some homeless guy put up posters for his missing pet alligator so we left you there because they were really just Chinese takeout menus.
Please tell me joes at work safe and sound and doesn't smell like jail?
Is it really road head if took place on kayaks in the river?
BECKY! ITS ANDY FROM LAST NIGHT WITH THE PILL
Andy, Sorry you have the wrong number. But good luck with Becky!
almost dropped my phone in the toilet but it somehow bounced off my tit and landed on the floor. Boobs: saving me hundreds of dollars in bar tabs and smartphones since '09
New Orleans is just like you. Dirty but beautiful and will always have a special place in my heart
I guess I called her at 2am, demanding that she bring us food. She told us to order pizza, and I yelled "DON'T MENTION PIZZA!" I recall nothing.
she's 6'2. you bet your ass i slept with her.
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