im sorry i didnt take advantage of you..iwaned to
i wanted you to too
this is the fifth day in a row i've woken up after 3 pm, hungover. I might die when snowmageddon is finally over and we have to go back to class. my liver wont know how to take it.
If you bang a chick other than your girlfriend while playing tiger woods on xbox I wonder if an accomplishment would come up...
So my teacher figured out I made a drinking game out of her lecture. Once my drink was gone she let us out. Happy St. Patricks day class. Your welcome
Umm. Any where really. Alcohol and boobs. Those are the requirements.
He spanked me with a plate. I'm not sure where this is going...
Yeah things got weird. You ate an entire bag of hotdog buns, then tried to catch a tree on fire with a candle.
I'm a little nervous about this St. Patty's Day party. Seriously, we're still finding stuff from the Halloween party.
Just took 4 secret shots in his bathroom to not remember him naked.
we're a generation of lazy underachieving stoners and uncreative overachieving automatons. you're golden
it is a dangerous dangerous place where morals and dignity go to die and all your fantasies about men become reality.
You drunk-dialed me and asked me to describe my burrito
New low: eating a buttered roll while taking a shit.
This is why we're soulmates.
Need ride home. Girls. Stolen keg. Rolling down streets. Horny girls. No condoms. Rescue needed. girls and beer in exchange for rescue and bacon?
I. Hate. You. Where are you, are said girls cute, and how did you know I bought bacon? And how does this always happen to you?
Smarter than the average bear
Ok. After that I think I'm going to drag queen jello wrestling if you would care to join.
Randomize