so how much must it suck for him to know that the penis of his best man has been in his wife's mouth before?
Your sister got a Brazilian yesterday. It looks great
woke up with food on the counter from chipotle, taco bell, green cactus, and on the border take out. explain?
you were trying to get this Spanish chick to sleep with you. you were showing her how much you "loved her native food."
You seriously need to keep doing my sexting for me. I just said something about "riding cock like a dick rodeo"
Well, my mom brought up me being vague about losing my license and she gave me the intervention look. so i left before they could bring out their heartfelt letters...
It was perfect I came I passed out in his comfortable bed then a glass of jack Daniels fell from the bed post and spilled all over my face
Used a cardboard box as a pillow and a towel as a blanket. Its like the great depression over here
wearing my roomate's scarf as a dress...halloween 2011 ladies and gentlemen
WHO INVENTED HANGOVERS WHERE ARE MY CLOTHES
Apparently love is stronger than SoCo
Just because I don't want to be her booty call doesn't mean I wanna stop getting tit pics. I'm a sucker for double D's
I sent "Rawrrrr" to 151 matches on Tinder. I feel like thats a substantial size of the DC female population.
We'll never be able to grow apart now. You can't look at a stranger & say "Yea I ate goldfish crackers off his dick." & just be casual about that.
well my apartment and my life are still a disaster but I did clean off my desk so that's gotta count for something...
When i said you could use my car and have sex in the back....i wasn't being serious.
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