I GPSed you we're an hour and 14min away from each other
and it's going to stay that way
I love having a boyfriend. I just ate pancakes with regular syrup and chocolate syrup, I havent shaved my legs in a week, and Im still going to get laid tonight.
fuck. you.
You're really doing everyone a disservice by wearing pants all the time.
is there a way to sugar-coat "shes in jail" when someone is texting me asking where their friend is?
as he was fingering me, all I was thinking about was how lucky his girlfriend is...
I'm pretty sure that I drunkenly used the phrase "I just want his beard all over my body" way too many times last night.
So I deleted all the text from my phone, was looking for my mom's coffee order and show the coffee guy the pic of me eating pussy.
My manager just held my hair while I threw up in a dumpster. New low.
I want to have sex with Will Smith. I guess I have a thing with 90s sitcom stars. Stamos, Joey Lawrence, John Goodman.
like, is this a date?? I'm sitting on his couch drinking a juice box while he makes taquitos in sweat pants
This weekend I was almost blinded by a cumshot to the eye, so happy Labor Day I guess
She's currently singing "I'm gonna keep on lovin you" to her pillow. How do you think tonight went?
Here when you come to your senses come back here and I'll fuck you back out of them.
Ya know. I was thinking of my slutty moments the other day and finally know which one makes the number 1 spot.
I told him it was fine and then I keyed his car.
Randomize
