she said it was ok for her to take her top off in the hot tub but she didn't take off her bottoms because that would be slutty
this text is just filler to avoid a lull in the conversation
hey everyone... booty call? my house tonight. bring friends to fuck my friends.
maybe next time you'll take an ex boyfriend warning you that she's batshit crazy as a warning instead of a challenge
there was a kid getting taken out of the waterpark handcuffed to a wheelchair singing "tryna catch me ridin dirty"
So that wine I told you about is vile...
That the stuff you brewed in your dorm closet? Are you actually going to drink it?
Yup. It's drinkable. Might go blind, but I've got to use my chemistry minor for something.
i love you man. i hope we fuck some serious shit up this summer.
A guy in the dance floor is raising the roof with an axe in hand. I love Halloween.
I just got high off one hit and the. Spent 20 minutes inspecting the gasket of our refridgerator and researching ways to replace it
Still drunk on my morning "run" which has turned into a walk. Just burped fireball
if my uterus stops caving in on itself long enough for me to be alive I'm there
Today's goals: get day drunk then sober up in time for the walking dead tonight.
We've had gay sex and pie, the holiday season has officially begun.
If we both don't have awesome filthy sexual experiences to share in the morning...we are no longer best friends.
The only food I have to eat is weed gummies and magic mushrooms... This is peak 34
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